Emily-Shackleton


 * Challenges, Chapter 6, Style - 10/7/11**
 * //**Exercise 6.1 (three passages)**//


 * //**Exercise 6.2 (one passage)**//

1) In recent years, scholars have reassessed Columbus' place in Western history, due to appearance of new interpretations about the meaning of the discovery of America. 2) In an emergency room situation, usuallly the on-site doctor will decide when a patient is irrational whether or not medication should be adminsiterd. 3) When students trace transitions in well-written articles, the coherence in their own writing improves. 4) Residents resist the building of mental health facilities in residental neighborhoods due to the belief that the few examples of improper management of metal health facilities in residential settings is indicative of future success and desirabilility. 5) With the decline in network television viewing in favor of cable and rental DVDs, networks' awareness of the need to revise programming grows. 3) The author abandons his impassioned narrative style and treats conspiracy theories with caution. When he begins narrating again, however, he invests his prose with the same vigor and prose. 4) To foster more effective communication with employess of varying literacy levels, business executives have written their directives with utmost simplicity. As you probably heard in the news or from your children: students reported numerous incidents of racial and sexual harassment on our campus over the last several weeks. These crimes remain severe for us, even though, unfortunately, crimes of racial and sexual violence occur around the nation. Graffiti and spoken insults constituted the majority of the 10-12 incidents; perpetrators initiated physical contact in two cases, but perpetrators left victims uninjured.
 * Challenges, Chaper 4, Style - 9/16/11****﻿**
 * //**Exercise 4.1**//
 * **//Two sentences from 4.4//**
 * **//Exercise 4.5//**

An environment in which to live, work, and study without the fear of harassment and taunts because of race, gender, religion, or ethnicity will be a committment and is a necessary step. Bigotry and intolerance will not be permitted by me, and the committment to diversity on campus is met uniquivocally. Steps have been taken for the improvement of the campus safety initiatives in the housing on campus. There is a tradition of diversification on U of X's campus which we are proud of.

//Explanation:// Changing the first paragraph to the active voice, with subjects visible, holds the university accountable for the crimes on its campus. The language paints a very real picture of the danger to students. It is very possible they may become victims of sexual or racial violence if things do not change. It sounds more like a news report than a sympathetic and apologetic speech. In the previous version, the impersonal nature at the beginning allows the listener to disassociate from the events and dangers to a certain extent; the newer version forces them to confront the realities of the world in which their children go about their day. Changing the second paragraph to the passive voice makes the university look like it is taking less concrete action to combat the crimes on campus and makes it appear almost weak. Strong language implies strong character; parents want their kids to be safe when they are away from home, and they want to know that the university is doing everything in its power to make that happen. "Steps have been taken," is extremely ambiguous, and, as a parent, I would want to know what, specifically, that means.